Bad Brad’s Big Blog Theory
Suddenly, there was a huge cacophonous sound. The event was actually unimaginably tiny, and there was probably nothing quite like sound yet, but FINALLY, after who knows how long, time itself was invented. At long last, with the appearance of sensible chronologies, event could follow event, and shit happened. At that instant, this minuscule primal orifice belched forth the entire essential underlying ingredient that constitutes all of our energy and matter, time and space, and what not.
The dense primordial goo was impregnated with something dark and yeasty. This caused the spacey-ness of “the everything” to grow and grow, thus creating directions in all directions. Then, just as time had allowed for the separation of events, space now allowed for the separation of things, and with growth even more so. The hot cosmic pie was then set to cool on the window sill of thermal conservation.
All things being equal, they really weren’t. Thus parity being what it isn’t, some of the stuff prevailed over other stuff in the first great war of attrition, and matter banished anti-matter to the margins.
Then on one fateful glorious day before days, matter and energy went their separate ways in a somewhat less-than-uniform uncoupling. At last, data could be recorded, compiled, and overwhelming. The little seeds of that non-uniformity pressed their material advantage, and their massiveness snowballed.
It is important to remember that at this point in history all of the galaxies in the Universe were still just galaxy wannabees, mere wisps of minor temperature fluctuations. This was to remain true for a long time to come. God is mostly dark energy.
Skywise Unlimited 
January 1, 2012 at 08:40
Not claiming to be an expert or anything, hardly even an amateur on such ideas, but I thought matter doesn’t exist without energy (sound) …..so if they’ve uncoupled as if they can mutually exist exclusively..what happened to the matter?
January 1, 2012 at 09:19
The “uncoupling” is the word cosmologists use to refer to a time when the Universe was cool enough for light (electromagnetic energy) and matter to go their separate ways, which I take to mean that protons could exist for an appreciable amount of time without getting dissolved back into energy by being slammed with gamma radiation. This also means that for the first time the Universe would have become relatively transparent, that light could travel some distance without hitting something.
The importance of the event is that it is said to have created a “lasting” measurable effect known as the cosmic microwave background radiation.
From Wiki: “In physical cosmology, the term decoupling [or uncoupling] is often used for the moment during recombination when the rate of Compton scattering became slower than the expansion of the universe. At that moment, photons nearly stopped their interactions with charged matter and “decoupled”, producing the cosmic microwave background radiation as we know it.”
January 1, 2012 at 10:12
I don’t see coupons. Where are the coupons?
October 1, 2012 at 15:12
Refreshingly witty, thank you. What I really want to know is do you own the knitted creation of the earth being held up by 4 elephants and the giant turtle and, if so, how can I get one? 🙂
October 1, 2012 at 16:31
It was made by this woman: http://www.planetjune.com/
February 6, 2013 at 11:16
I really was initially researching for tips for my personal blog
and observed ur blog, “And so it begins.
| Skywise Unlimited”, do you mind in case I use some of your
own ideas? With thanks -Courtney
February 6, 2013 at 17:21
Go for it.
April 25, 2013 at 14:28
i like this place!