Tag Archives: exodus

My Way or the Highway

April 22, 2012

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Mosaic Law Leviticus 18:1 to 27:34 18:1 “Listen to me. I am God. Don’t behave the way you did in Egypt, running around buck nekid all the time.” Yahweh gave Moses a long sermon about nudity. He explained when to get naked, when not to get naked, who to see naked, who not to be […]

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The Show Must Go On

April 15, 2012

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The Tabernacle Leviticus 1:1 to 16:2 1:1 Yahweh talked to Moses in the new tabernacle tent and said things like “Bring me the Israelite’s best cows and slit their throats and smear blood all over.” And of course “Cook those tasty critters extra crispy! I like my steaks well done and extra lean.” Yahweh included […]

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Golden Cow

April 8, 2012

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Worshiping Baal Exodus 32:1 to 40:38 32:1 What could be taking Moses so long? The people grew restless for mindless rituals and excessive dogma so Aaron collected all the men’s earrings and molded them into the figure of a young cow. The people looked at the statue and said “There he is! That’s him! That […]

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Rules are Rules

April 1, 2012

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Ten Commandments Exodus 20:1 to 31:18 20:1 Yahweh spoke directly to Moses and laid down the law. (1) “I am the only god that helped you escape from Egypt. Don’t even consider any of those other gods to be more important than me, ever.” (2) “Don’t make any religious statues of anything at all, not […]

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God is into War

March 25, 2012

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Parting the Sea Exodus 12:43 to 19:3 12:43 Yahweh said to Moses “When you have the feast of hard biscuits, don’t let strangers or foreigners eat any. If you buy a male slave, first separate him from the tip of his winky, then he can have a biscuit.” Yahweh went on and on about the […]

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